Is this Modifier Misplaced?

This crossed my desk today:

I have almost exclusively practiced environmental law for the past 10 years.

My initial thought is that, in this case, the modifying phrase (adverbial, I think) “almost exclusively”  implies that this poor individual has done nothing other than practice law for 10 years.  I would have said:

I have practiced environmental law almost exclusively for the past 10 years.

But since I lack the time to look this up at the moment, I put it to you readers: what do you think? Misplaced, or snug as a bug in its rightful place in the sentence?

Filed under: Modifiers

I am not alone.

It’s reassuring to know that someone else has noticed.

Filed under: Punctuation

Punctuating Bulleted Lists

If a bullet item is a complete sentence in itself (i.e., it doesn’t complete a sentence begun by the introductory text), it ends with a period. If one bullet item is a complete sentence, then all of the bullet items should be (i.e., sentences and non-sentences shouldn’t be mixed within one bulleted list). For example:

 Students should adhere to several guidelines.

·    Always use 1-inch margins.

·    Use bold and italicized text sparingly.

·    Run the spell check before sending out the document.

If an entire bullet list forms a complete sentence together with the introductory text, AND if it contains items that have internal commas, the bullet items are separated by semicolons. The last item, which completes the sentence, ends in a period. For example:

Students should be careful to:

·    Apply rules of grammar, mechanics, and punctuation;

·    Check their spelling; and

·    Present their work in an attractive format.

If an entire bullet list forms a complete sentence together with the introductory text, BUT the items do not contain internal commas, the bullet items are separated by commas. The last item, which completes the sentence, ends in a period. For example:

Before the test, students should:

·    Sharpen their pencils,

·    Straighten their books, and

·    Make sure to write their names on their papers.

Filed under: Bulleted Lists

Modifiers

If you just asked yourself “What’s a modifier?” please don’t close your browser! There is something here for you, as well as for those few readers who paid attention in 9th grade English.

Modifiers are important to us because they appear in every JA document and most of us get them wrong at least half the time.

Grammatically speaking, modifiers are words or phrases that describe, qualify, clarify, or give more detail about another word or concept within a sentence. They function as adjectives or adverbs, but are different in the sense that they can be phrases or entire clauses of sentences.

In plain English, this means that modifiers are (generally) phrases that give more information about another word or phrase. For example, in this sentence the phrase “newly constructed” is modifying “tunnel”:

The newly constructed tunnel provides system redundancy.

In the following sentences, can you identify the modifiers?

The 3,465-foot tunnel crossed under two major roadways.

The tunnel was 3,465 feet long and crossed under two major roadways.

The crosstown railroad track was reclaimed for light rail use.

The decision-making process took about three weeks.

The night shift workers contributed significantly to the success of the project.

Here they are with modifiers bolded:

The 3,465-foot tunnel crossed under two major roadways.

The tunnel was 3,465 feet long and crossed under two major roadways.

The crosstown railroad track was reclaimed for light rail use.

The decision-making process took about three weeks.

The night shift workers contributed significantly to the success of the project.

There are two interesting lessons here. The first relates to the use of single words, combined words, and hyphenates as modifiers — and the second is a lesson about when a phrase isn’t a modifer. Let’s look at the first lesson first, shall we?

Modifiers often have a compound structure (two or more words that function together as one unit of meaning — e.g., “firehouse” has a different meaning than “fire” and “house” individually, but it was combined from the two words). Compounds can be open (night shift), closed (crosstown), or hyphenated (decision-making). Usually a compound starts out open, over time begins to be used with a hyphen, and then becomes a closed compound. To determine if something is an open, closed, or hyphenated compound, you must look it up in the dictionary.

The second lesson is about when a phrase is or is not being used as a modifier. This most often comes up in our size descriptions of tunnels, as in these two sentences:

The 3,465-foot tunnel crossed under two major roadways.

The tunnel was 3,465 feet long and crossed under two major roadways.

In the first sentence, “3,465-foot” is modifying “tunnel.” We know this because if we take out the measurement, the sentence is still a complete sentence (e.g., it expresses a full thought: The tunnel crossed under two major roadways).

In the second sentence, “3,465 feet long” is not a modifier, but instead, a critical part of the sentence. Try removing it, and you get “The tunnel was and crossed under two major roadways.”

When a modifier consists of two words/units functioning as one semantic unit, they generally must be hyphenated. Thus, the hyphen between “3,465” and “feet” in the first sentence.

(Note that technically, if you said “the 3,465-foot-long tunnel”, you would need the hyphen between “foot” and “long” as well. However, I’m not fighting that battle, as this correct usage is not generally observed in the industry.)

This can be a difficult concept, and certainly isn’t an easy one to explain. If you have questions about– or corrections to–my explanation, please do post a comment here or e-mail me and I’ll get back to you.

For more about the wonderful world of hyphens and modifiers, click on the category links at right. I’ve discussed this topic with more brevity in the past, and I’ve also previously posted about dangling modifiers. Thrilling, isn’t it?

Filed under: Hyphens, Modifiers

What is, is

Many of you recognize that you have a particular writing style. You may tend to write short sentences, use flowery language, or insert a lot of parentheticals (like me). But, have you ever considered that companies have styles? Whether intentionally or not, they do!

Organizational styles develop because people in organizations repurpose language and text that already exists, and people tend to write in styles similar to the style of what they read.

At JA, we have developed a worrisome habit that stems from a misapplication of a syntactic style called E-prime, which seeks to eliminate all forms of the verb “to be.” At its best, E-prime can force writers to think differently and use more creative and vivid verbs (e.g., “The project enhanced transportation options for the community” rather than “The project was a transportation expansion project.”). At its worst, E-prime can be inaccurate, grammatically incorrect, or just plain awkward.

Consider this frequent JA usage:

“The project represents the longest tunnel drive in history.”

This is an inaccurate sentence and an incorrect use of the verb “represent.” The project did not “represent” the longest tunnel drive in history; it simply was the longest. One of the philosophical bases of E-prime is that reality is perceived, not actual. Regardless of one’s opinion on that matter, the implication has no place in our work. We deal in facts, and if it was the longest tunnel drive, it was. 

Consider another example:

“The project consists of 1,560 feet of driven tunnel.” 

It is incorrect to say that one thing consists of another; the definition of “consists” that applies in this case is of multiple parts combining to make up a single new whole, like so:

“The project consists of 1,560 feet of driven tunnel, four shafts, and a new control building.”

Our final example is one that is not incorrect, but is awkward:

“The tunnels have not had an inspection since 1955.”

This sentence resulted from the desire to avoid saying “The tunnels have not been inspected since 1955.” The definition of “had” that applies in this case is “to get” — but we wouldn’t say “The tunnels have not gotten an inspection since 1955” would we? “Have not had” is only slightly less inelegant.

The bottom line? Use E-prime to liven up your language, but when something is, just say so.

Filed under: Lisa's Pet Peeves, Verbs, Word Choice, Writing

Don't Push that Send!

Not too long ago I found myself reading through an e-mail message that I had sent to a colleague, cringing. Had I really written “to” when I meant “too”? Had I really left out words in a sentence?

 Yep.

I take for granted that I’ve always been pretty good at composing text and avoiding those pesky little errors (that’s why I do what I do, after all). But certain factors can take a toll on all of us. Multitasking. Our minds getting ahead of our fingers. An empty stomach or a looming deadline.

When you find yourself hurrying or distracted, take a moment to double-check your e-mails. Breathe. Focus. Slow down as you read, and really look at every word. It doesn’t have to be elegant prose, but it ought to be error free.

Filed under: Writing

Before & After

I’ve gotten feedback from several of you that you find it helpful when I post examples of not-so-perfect writing with a (hopefully improved) edit. Accordingly, I decided to take that approach in this first post of 2008 (which hopefully marks the beginning of more regular posts here).

I pulled this text from the ‘Guide to Best Practice for the Installation of Pipe Jacks and Microtunnels’ (Pipe Jacking Association, 1995) – a book that is really nicely designed in a way that supports the technical material. This book was published in Britain, hence the British spellings.

BEFORE

It is recommended that this section is studied carefully and used to select the best excavation and face support method for the ground conditions applicable to any scheme.

There are many types and manufacturers of pipe jacking shields and TBMs, and each type will have its own design and performance characteristics. After selection of an excavation system the designer/installer should contact the equipment manufacturer to obtain precise information specific to the chosen equipment, to ascertain the suitability of its operational capacity to handle the ground conditions.

Summarised here is a guide to some of the criteria to look for in assessing the suitability of the equipment for good installation.

DISCUSSION

Paragraph 1
The passive construction makes the first sentence unwieldy. For instructional materials, the imperative is often a good choice. (Do this. Don’t do that.) Second, the phrase “applicable to any scheme” is unnecessary and vague. The sentence could end after “select the best excavation and face support method for the ground conditions.” Introducing the idea of a “scheme” reduces the impact of the sentence.

Paragraph 2
Again, we want to change the passive voice. Then, consider the last statement. Should the user not already have ascertained the suitability of the equipment’s operational capacity for the given ground conditions? Hasn’t the author just stated above that this is a purpose of this section of text? It’s best to combine the two similar ideas and place them in an order that matches the order in which the actions should be taken.

Paragraph 3
This paragraph isn’t necessary once actions are placed in the proper order and placed together.

AFTER

Study this section carefully. These guidelines will help you select the best excavation and face support methods for the ground conditions you expect to encounter, and assess the suitability of various types of equipment.

There are many types of pipe jacking shields and TBMs, and each type has unique design and performance characteristics. After an excavation system is selected, the designer/installer should contact the equipment manufacturer to obtain precise information about the equipment performance.

NOTE

If you are not comfortable using the imperative or the pronoun “you” in your writing, you can still write in the active voice, but you will not give directives. For example, your first sentences might be: “The best excavation and face support methods are the methods best suited to the ground conditions. The guidelines in this section summarize criteria for selecting excavation and face support methods appropriate to the anticipated conditions.”

Filed under: Uncategorized, Writing, Writing in Engineering

Writing Checklist

I know some of you find it handy to have a “checklist” of things to accomplish while you are writing. I have created a slightly expanded version of the checklist I used in the writing trainings I gave in the branch offices over the past few months. It is posted here.

The checklist is organized from the beginning of the writing process (planning for your audience) through the end (writing clear and concise sentences). It is intended to remind you of some of the best writing practices and to help make it easier for you to craft effective documents.

If you have questions about or suggestions for this checklist, please let me know. 

Filed under: Writing

On Wiki-ing Well

Wikipedia is a wealth of information, but not all of it is accurate. You can use Wikipedia to get a basic understanding or overview of a topic, but you should not assume the information is factual without double-checking it against credible sources. 

It follows, then, that you should not cite Wikipedia as an expert source in technical papers. If you find an interesting fact on Wikipedia, and you want to cite it, go back to the original source listed in the Wikipedia bibliography (assuming that source is credible). If no source is provided, you can try to track the statement through Google or through our excellent library resources.

Filed under: References

Use of Articles

I ran across a helpful paper about the use of articles (a, an, the). I’ve previously posted about the importance of using articles (check out that post by clicking on “Articles” in the topic list on the right). This paper takes the next step by helping you select which article to use, which is not always as straightforward as it may seem. Those of you who are non-native speakers of English should find this especially helpful, as this is a tricky element of English.

http://www.ccp.rpi.edu/esl.html

Filed under: Articles (A An The)